Love during a pandemic
By no means make a mistake. I am not writing a love story during this horrible breakout.
I am giving out a perspective. What it means to love someone when they are extremely sick.
On January 26, 2015 I attended a lunch event at a temple in outskirts of Bangalore. Minutes after drinking water at the place, I had a weird feeling in my throat . Something was coming on for sure. Shortly after, I had some sort of flu. I was 5 years younger than today and healthy as a horse. I was able to do my everyday work but the infection would not go away.
The first week I had some ugly black green stuff coming out of my throat. Doctor had given me mild antibiotics hoping its common flu. But it didn’t go away.
I asked my parents not to come home as my mother’s immunity was compromised due to chronic illnesses. But hardly two days since I told them, they landed at my doorstep much to my chagrin.
Shortly, my sister in law arrived from USA during the wedding time of two of our cousins. Busy with shopping, we ran around the town. My infection had not gone away after a stronger dose of antibiotics but I ignored in the background of all the running around we did.
One day, I took my little niece to my mother’s house as she loved to draw and hoped to learn something from my artistic mom. Mom was in bed with some bug. Scared, I dreaded that tiny fact thinking it is not something pleasant . Worried I had given her my unusual flu, I panicked.
My sister in law and niece left for USA soon but my mother was quite sick. There was fluid retention in her body and she was struggling. She had had her fair share of allopathic medicines and we decided to take her to the city’s best ayurvedic hospital. There, I too took a prescribed amount of ayurvedic medicines for my unending flu. But it was not meant to be.
We rushed mother to a bigger hospital as her recovery was poor and deterioration had begun. All this while, our family was closely with her with no precautions of any kind. I also slept in her beds.
The first hospital rejected us to get her admitted. In hushed tones, they spoke about quarantine facilities and not being able to accommodate.
After relatives arrived, my cousin found a hospital on the other side of town. We soon found out, our dear mom had contracted H1N1 somehow and was worst hit.
The days after were spent in agony and anxiety as she was alone in the ICU. Her only kidney had to be saved. We were all wearing masks and on tamiflu. We just waited at the steps outside the ICU hoping we could catch a glimpse of her. Dad was asked to avoid visiting her as people above 60 were considered high risk. But we all wanted to be with her soonest. Thank the amazing doctors who treated her and saved her from near claws of death. When they shifted her to the ward, we were all on N 95 masks.
The steroids had made mom disoriented but she had become a child and talking absurdly sweet things when I ended up sleeping with her in the ward. It was a special moment for me. I had no fear of contracting the virus. I just wanted mom to come home. In hindsight it may appear foolish. But in all through the infection I was battling my own wierd flu which finally went away after 4 months. I was also kissing and hugging my mom to make her feel secured and loved. She didn’t care about my infection. Why should I about hers? (Please note I wasn’t thinking rationally. I don’t advise this unless directed by doctors).
It was also heartwarming that my aunts and uncles visited her, though it puzzled my mom to see everyone in masks.
I am sure my dad and brother have their side of stories to tell but in all that pain and anguish, I am glad that my mother received the care and love she richly deserved from her family and doctors.
A patient heals with medicines, but their will to fight their illness comes from love. Love can be in any form. Not necessarily physical.
Don’t just hold back.
